Family growth often leads to jealousy

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Family growth often leads to jealousy


Most children wish for a sibling. But if the Baby is there, must share the Greater the attention of the parents all of a sudden. Especially first-born feel, then reset. “Children are jealous when a sister or a brother comes to the world, is quite normal,” says Karin Schreiner-Kürten, a psychologist at the AOK-Bundesverband. “A good preparation and targeted donation from the parents to help the Elderly then, with the new Situation.”

If a sibling is there, need Older a lot of attention

With the birth of a Geschwisterchens a lot of changes in a child’s life: It should be noted that not everything revolves around it. The more important it is for parents to announce their first-born offspring in a timely manner. As a rule of thumb: the younger the first-born child is, the later the adults should tell him about the Baby.

In children up to two years, it is sufficient to explain shortly before the birth of another offspring is expected. “In pregnancy, you can involve your child by letting together baby clothes to sort, it through the belly stress, of friends with an infant to visit or picture books together on the subject of look at,” advises Karin Schreiner-Kürten. The hospital stay of the mother’s parents should prepare for your son or daughter also. The child should know the Person, it is looked after, before, as well as possible.

Larger also give a gift to

If the sibling child is in the world, and relatives or friends come to visit, the first view is usually the infant. The Elderly are no longer suddenly in the center and react all the more jealous. The psychologist advises: “make Sure that the older child gets something when the first gifts for the Baby to arrive. It should also be and his progress assessed.”

Just in the first time, it is important that parents give the Larger as much attention as possible and give him your love show – so you can mitigate fears of loss. “Take some time for the older child when the Baby is taken care of. So feel it, that it is just as important as the baby is, and that you have as much as the past,” says carpenter-Kürten. The mother or the father can also get baby pictures of the firstborn, and to him of the time tell when he was an infant.

Time with older child alone to spend

It is also important that parents spend time with your older daughter or your older son alone, for example, when reading, Romp or Play. So you give your Big, once again, the sense of being the main person. It makes sense, moreover, that the fathers deal specifically with the older child when the mother needs to breastfeed, or to take care of the newborn. Carpenter-Kürten: “Maintain cherished rituals, by reading aloud the first-born, for example, as usual before going to bed with a story.”

In the care of the baby include

So the older child does not feel excluded, and can involve parents in the care of the baby. For example, you can ask it whether it wants to help with bathing, Wrap or Lotion, and then for his cooperation, praise. If the Larger one is responding, however, even aggressive, should remain the adult after chance left, and his mixed feelings accept.

Generally speaking, jealousy, which is shown open is better than hidden Aggression. Not infrequently, the child is in front of the eyes of the parents, is very dear to the siblings. It will be left alone with him, annoys, or it nudges the Baby. “Talk clearly with the Major and tell him that he can’t handle too rough with the newborn. The criticism should, however, relate to the matter and not to the Person of the child,” advises the psychologist. “Avoid, however, is that the child feels guilty, because it has negative feelings for the sibling.”