Fremdel phase On the safe side
Well-known suddenly, with suspicion, or rejected, can comfort only mom and dad. What is the role of the fear of strangers, and how best to deal with it. Sabine’s grandmother leans over her grandchild, the peacefully on the carpet playing. But as soon as she comes closer, the rest over. Sabine’s eyes look frightened, the face contorts, the mouth of a shame penetrates full of screaming. Only the hurrying mother can reassure the child again, as Sabine on her Arm.
Sabine is now 8 months old and has referred to their fremdel phase, also as an eight-month anxiety, expressive started. From now on, you will be on a lot of things, which is not to say mom or dad, with reluctance and distrust to respond. The parents make the life easier, if you understand that Sabine is a necessary development. Because toddlers perceive between the seventh and eighth month, for the first time, differences between people are aware of.
So Are Sabine extensively with the Gestures, smells and facial expressions of their parents. When grandma shows up now, notice the Little: Oh, Yes, it’s quite different than my parents, as I hold my distance. Because Sabine can’t put your feeling in words, not their many means of communication. But those who she chooses, speak in a clear and really unequivocal language: crying and screaming, behind mom’s legs and hide the head in front of the “Stranger” away.
What relatives and friends quickly, personally, and often even as a child pulled a customization point, is basically a safety measure against New and Strange. Experts say that caution and distrust to be worthwhile, even, to protect yourself from negative experiences.
Unfortunately, you can’t say that Sabine’s parents, and grandma, what time is this Phase is temporary, because every child has a different Temperament. So, the sudden fear weeks, but can take months – when the Baby is stronger, the other is less pronounced. The encounter with unfamiliar situations and people is a trigger, a further separation from familiar persons. Sabine’s relationship to the parents is now so intense that you react in the case of a separation anxiety. Mom or dad leave the room, she feels insecure. Your parents come back, radiates over the whole face. Sabine needs in those moments – even more than usual protection and understanding.
Your cautious behavior towards Strangers is by the way, at the same time a sign of devotion and of confidence to the parents. Therefore, mom and dad can enjoy those moments in which the Small you seek protection, quiet with Pride. Because of the comfort and security experienced by Sabine, by you, forms the basis for this is that the child may be curious and even to aware of his environment. And actually, after a few minutes on the Arm of the Sabine dares a glance to the “strangers” grandma and … smiles.
Tips for parents
There are specific tools that make the fremdel phase for the child and his environment.
- Understanding reach by telling friends and Relatives of the fremdel phase of the child.
- The child and his Fears seriously, instead of fighting it.
- In fremdel moments, no contact force. Prefer a bit of distance to go and a calming effect on the child act.
- In the case of a separation, for example, if the mother works, or the parents out, the child slowly to the caregiver to get used to.
- With small game, the fear of separation or Strangers break down. Look-Look-game: the face behind a cloth and hide, and then again pull away, with the time, the duration of hiding careful to increase. Important: When you Hide in another room, never the door between himself and the child close. For contacting a Ball that you can roll without coming closer. Or the “Stranger” is a stuffed animal of the baby in the Hand which raises the interest of the child.